Sami Baby, Slip a Sable Under the Tree ... For Me

"Wait, that's Santa Baby." My great friend Steph sent me an email w/ that in it recently and it tickled me!

So, I talked to Daddy this morning. They're at the lovely Horseshoe in Bossier City, LA in a three room suite. Of course my mom has never seen such a thing before, and she can't put into words how lovely it is which was fine w/ me because I really didn't want to talk to her anyway. I didn't need a buttload of reminders -- again! But my worst fear may be coming true: I made reservations for my parents in Fort Worth for Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights and asked Daddy where I should reserve next, expecting him to say Oklahoma City but he didn't. He said to hold up on that, they might cut 'em a trail for home after that. I was like, "WHAT!!" He said Mom's not much for sightseeing, and today she's even staying at the hotel to "catch up" on her soaps. I couldn't believe it! That's not why you go on vacation -- you leave all the "home" stuff behind! It'll be there when you get back! I was sort of upset about that because Daddy loves to gawk around at things, see all the sights but Mom's wet blanket personality is rising to the surface despite her promises to me that it wouldn't. Sigh. So they could be back on Sunday or Monday, as I'd originally suspected -- see counter above.

But it's not all bad news. You'll never guess what's right next to the hotel they're staying at ... Go ahead, guess. No. No. Of course not a porn store! A BASS PRO SHOPS! That tickled Daddy -- he was so happy because it's his favorite store on earth, of course. The Louisiana Boardwalk is also there and I wish they'd visit that ... But I don't know. I'm sure Daddy will see it but if Mom doesn't leave the hotel today ("There are TVs in the livingroom, bedroom and even the bathroom!"), they check out tomorrow, she's not going to see anything except her soaps. Ticks me off ...

Trace Adkins will be in Sikeston, MO -- two short hours from me -- on 9 August.
What do you think, should I go see that hot stuff?
Oh yeah, I think so too. I think it'd be a crime to miss him! Oh be still my beating If you haven't heard his latest, Swing -- DO! It's on his latest CD, not Songs About Me -- it's newer than that but I don't recall the name of it right now. It's of that country-rock genre Trace has been singing lately, "Swing batter, batter, swing!" Loves it!!

So you want to know all about Mineral Makeup, and why I -- and a gazillion other females -- love it? Read all about it:
HERE
It's the greatest invention to come along in my lifetime! Okay, it's the greatest makeup invention to come along in my lifetime. Trust me.

And a verdict has been reached in the Andrea Yates trial! Her previous guilty verdict was overturned and any way you look at it, she's gonna do time -- either in prison or in an asylum. Oh. They'll announce it "shortly" but it'll be live.

Meanwhile, there's no deal on the Lebanon cease-fire and who among us is surprised about that?

Something else to make you go DUH: In Sync Star Lance Bass admits he's gay.

Buffets, Inc. has bought Ryan's to make the nation's largest buffet chain. Somehow, I don't see this as being a Good Thing but the story is:
HERE

OH! Get a load of this headline: Motorola Unveils New, Unpronounceable Cell-Phone Models. If that doesn't grab your eyeball I don't know what would! From the article, "ROSEMONT, Illinois — Motorola Inc.on Monday unveiled several new handsets, including the Krzr and the Rizr, which are narrower than its flagship Razr." I was all set to buy a Razr next month when my contract ends w/ Verizon but after reading the article I'm more confused than ever. You read it.
HERE
Sheesh. Guess I'll get my own unpronounceable cellphone next month.

I've been holding off posting this but I figure now is as good a time as ever. Everyone's using nifty, safe Firefox, right? Here are some must-have Firefox extensions -- I use a lot of these, which just makes me love Firefox all the more!
FIREFOX

At CNN.COM Castro says, "Don't worry US, I'll be gone before I'm 100," and Saddam is quoted as saying, "If I'm found guilty, just shoot me." Now, here's my question: How many gazillion people would pay for the right to do that? Anyone wanna take a guess? My guess is, if everyone bid on it, it would eliminate the national debt.

The Andrea Yates verdict, 12.03PM Central: Not Guilty by Reason of Insanity!

As I understand it, she'll no longer be an inmate w/ the Department of Corrections, she'll have a more normal life, be able to wear her own clothes, not be as restricted. I'm trying to remain neutral and try to understand that she was insane at the time of the murders but the fact remains that Noah, 7, John, 5, Paul, 3, Luke, 2, and Mary, 6 months are still dead. I do believe she had to be insane to drown her babies! The story is:
HERE

You may not have heard about the case of 5 year old Destiny Norton who lived right across from Liberty Park in Salt Lake City, Utah. I heard about it because I lived near Salt Lake and my great friend Lissy still lives just north of there, and I keep up w/ the news there. After searching for her for eight days her body was found in the basement of a neighbor whose backyard abutted Destiny's. Story is:
HERE and HERE
Unfortunately, Destiny's case didn't end as happily as Elizabeth Smart's. In 2002 Elizabeth, then 14, was taken from her bedroom and discovered 9 months later w/ two homeless people have yet to be brought to justice. I recently saw Elizabeth, now 18. She's beautiful, eloquent and most of all blessed.

Interesting Quotes of the Week from "Court TV":

"My first stalker."

— Actor Colin Farrell to host Jay Leno on "The Tonight Show" after he was approached by a woman on stage. Farrell quickly escorted her off the set and asked for security.

"Satan, the one and only Satan, not just a demon, but the singular Satan, would be executed ... It would fulfill the prophecy, the final battle, Armageddon."

— Forensic psychiatrist Dr. Phillip Resnick, testifying that defendant Andrea Yates believed that by killing her five children, she thought she was defeating Satan and fulfilling a prophecy.

"I knew that I got into this for all the wrong reasons, and it just wasn't me. I should've stayed with basketball."
Note: Do ya' think so??

— Death row inmate Mauriceo Brown, in an interview with CourtTVnews.com, on his life on the streets and confessing to a crime he says he did not commit. Brown was executed on July 19.

"Nothing about having a 176 IQ means you have good judgment."
Note: I've seen this time and again, especially regarding someone I'm close to. But it's sad because this person knows he's very intelligent yet keeps repeating the same mistakes over and over and over.

— Lawyer Barry Tarlow, defending convicted molester and geneticist William French Anderson, on Anderson's lack of social skills in an e-mail he wrote to his victim.

"I was tired of it. I guess I got to a point and snapped."

— Mary Winkler, who is accused of shooting her preacher husband to death. Investigators said she confessed to killing him after an argument about money, according to a statement read at her bail hearing.
Probably you don't know this but McMairy County isn't but twenty minutes from me so the case is unfolding virtually in my backyard. It's shocking, it's saddening and it's real life.
MARY WINKLER

Okay kids, I really have to go. I have tons of stuff to do today, including making sure the Big House is perfect because I doubt I'll go over there much more now. One thing's for sure -- I simply cannot get any sleep over there which I, of course, found out the hard way. I'm finished walking around like a zombie. *YAWN*

~Later gator!

My Geezers Are On Vacation!

Woo-hoo! But of course they'll be back. Meanwhile, if you think "PARTY! PARTY!" is taking care of the whole ranch all by myself then yeah, I've been doing a massive amount of partying indeed. Oh boy -- I may even get to mow the lawn! If it rains again I definitely will have to and wish me luck, okay? I'm highly allergic -- but, you gotta do what you gotta do. I'll sneeze my fool head off but I won't die and besides, Daddy just got a new lawn tractor (in addition to Green w/ Envy) and it's a red Toro. It cuts corners closer and I hope that's a help, not a hindrance. They might get sort of upset if I mow down a tree or something. I'm glad I don't have to take that into my own hands today -- it's 92° w/ 93% humidity outside today. I'd like to make it out to my pool to relax and unwind so I asked my Magic 8 Ball if I'd be able to? He said, "My reply is no." What does he know, anyway??

Hey, you guys haven't been pushing the red button have you? Believe me, I know who has and who hasn't so you better knock it off! You just can't resist it, can you ... ?

So my parents left on vacation Sunday afternoon about 1.00pm. I miss them -- I miss my daddy an awful lot -- but I don't bawl on the phone to him because I want them to have fun, at least as much fun as is possible even though my mom is missing her soaps. To my utter shock and surprise, Daddy told me today Mom's been happy the whole time they've been gone, just as happy as a lark, and said she'll have some catching up to do when she returns home. I honestly thought she'd get surly w/out them but I was wrong -- and you have no clue how happy I am that I was! And my da too, no doubt. So they left here and spent two nights in a suite in Tunica which was comped and today they're headed to the Horseshoe Casino in Bossier City, LA. This is a very new hotel and it's all-suite like the Rio in Vegas, and the two nights there are comped as well. Now, I don't care who you are -- having the first four days of your vacation free is pretty awesome. Now I'm fixing to make reservations for three nights in Fort Worth, TX for them and all I know is they want to stay near the Stockyards. After that I'm not sure where they're headed -- Oklahoma City, I believe but I could be wrong. But God bless 'em for taking their first vacation ever! Everything will be fine here ... unless I break my daddy's new truck. Perish the thought! But I have a plan in case I wreck it: I have a tow service and Serra Chevrolet on speed dial. I'm not stupid. I got it covered.

In The News:

Barbaro is doing as well as can be expected, stable after numerous cast changes. He was injured during the Preakness Stakes on 20 May. But now he's MY HERO

Richard Hatch, the first million dollar winner of Survivor as been sent to prison in Oklahoma for failing to pay taxes on his winnings. His attorney says, "It's bad for Richard, who is an outdoor person." If you recall, he became known as the "fat, naked guy" because he refused to wear clothes. HATCH DOES TIME

Giant-sized Mo'Nique was kicked off a United Airlines flight but I got no clue why. She says it was racism, United says she was a threat. Go figure.

Remember Ken Jennings who won $2.5 million on the game show Jeopardy? He has some not-so-kind words about that show HERE

And now I'm back! I spent all freakin' day making travel arrangements for the Raisinets for Fort Worth, TX and I was successful! I have them set up at a hotel right across from Billy Bob's. You don't know Billy Bob's? Let me put it this way: You go to Fort Worth and you neglect patronizing Billy Bob's -- don't come home! I kid you not it's like, a totally wasted trip. My parents just rolled into Bossier City, LA at the Horseshoe Casino pictured here:

The first is night time, the second is day time. It's beautiful! Oh man ... Just kill me now. Grumblegrumblegrumble. I could go too but something tells me the odds of me driving eight hours alone just ain't happenin' in the near future. Like, while I'm young!

Okay so everyone who knows me knows I've had an addiction to sparkly things. Well, get a load of this:

I saw those and I was like I mean, can you imagine? I wear flip flops and I love sparklies! Come to find out, the Swarovski Rhinestone craze is going on all over w/out me. Man, I gotta get out more! I do have the white bebe ones but "bebe" is in glitter, not rhinestones. Naturally, I must do something to bling up every single thing I own -- including the horses! That's right, next time you see them their hooves will be blinged out! Well -- okay, maybe not their hooves since they get trimmed once a month anyway but their halters for sure! I'm making the baby my first project -- if I jack him up, oh well.

I have to feed the horses now. I've been waiting for my parents to check in and call but I can wait no longer -- I'm almost 30 minutes late getting Beer For My Horses! Yikes.

More later~

I'm in Tunica, MS!

Oh yeah baby, I'm here and I'm lovin' it! Right now I'm waiting on Mama to call and then I'll go down to the pool, unwind in the jacuzzi, take a dip and lay out in the sun. Ahh, it's a rough life -- especially since this whole vacation is FREE! That's right, my suite is COMPED! I'm also loving the wireless especially since I get a 56Mb connection speed. We aren't even going to discuss what I have to look forward to when I return to the ranch. Sigh. I'll probably cry big fat tears when I get back, and then I'll get over it because frankly, I'm thankful I even have internet access waaaaaaay out there.

Last night I went to the concert and he was fabulous! I took lots of photos, including a couple w/ my phone which didn't turn out for crap, but I thought I'd give it a shot anyway. He did not remove his cowboy hat, and he was absolutely hothothot!! I almost couldn't stand it.

And you wonder why cowboy butts drive me nuts??

And he's sooo got the moves! Every time he danced a little allll the girls screamed! Eventually however, I began getting shoved and stepped on -- particularly by a bag about 65 years old. I was in the second row, right on the aisle and she was two seats down, suckin' down the beer. By 11.00 she jumped up, pushed me aside as she stepped on me and started dancing right -- and singing off-key -- in front of me. And by that time the Security Dudes just gave up, quit making everyone go back to their seats so the concert was over for me at that point. I finally went to the very back where I could see quite well -- and, I had my photos by then so it was okay. However, there were three guys back there and they didnt' need Dwight to have a good time -- they had Budweiser! One insisted on a dance, wouldn't let me leave until he had one. He got a little bit frisky but not too bad.

So I have six more concerts lined up -- but not here, they're in TN, AL, GA, etc. I'm going to see these guys: Might work in a little and and as well as I loved his long hair! And of course I'm not gonna miss or Absolutely no way. So some I'll get to see, some I won't, but I'm working on it. It all depends on the timing. But I'll go just about anywhere to see Chris Cagle, Trace Adkins and Montgomery Gentry. Trust me.

I've been waiting for my mom to call, but I have done give up. I'm outta here, headed for the pool! I'll talk to her later -- right now she and Da are putting up pickles! How lucky am I that I missed that??

Later ~~

But Of Course I'm Awake!

I've been going through this thing for about a week now, perhaps longer. I just can't sleep until I finally break down and take meds, usually around 5.00 AM and then I snooze for 3 - 4 hours. I've just about had it, I'm almost ready to collapse. When I say I'm sick and tired, it's for real! I should be sleeping I should be snoozing soundly I should be drooling in my sleep but get a load of it: You know what I'm doing instead? The same thing I do all the time: Day, night -- doesn't matter. I be all the time yawnin' but I keep moving, I do what I'm supposed to do. I have several issues I'm working on. One is working out better than it was, and that's Mama. She's pretty much runnin' around on her little wheels all the time, she wants things done and she wants them done now and I worry she's going to be upset if I'm late doing something. She has this "Honey Do" list for Daddy: The thing is, Daddy gets to workin' on that list, crossing things off and she finds a dozen more things to do. Now, this upsets me because it never ends and Mama's almost like she's you know? Either I go home and which gives me blasting headaches or I try to reason but that doesn't work out because -- I'm on the left, Mama's in the center and Daddy's on the right.
Sometimes it's just difficult. I really do get sick when I'm upset but I've not yet hurled all over my parents but I'm tellin' you, it's just around the bend. One of these days, the ultimate humiliation. Trust me.

And now my da's pc is ... well, I'm afraid it's fried. He said yesterday when the AC kicked on I guess it flickered and he went immediately into Safe Mode. I don't know what he did after that, but today he told me he turns it on and he gets nothing. He said he left it on for an hour today and nothing. Well, you know I don't mind working on it, I even manage to run maintenance on it, just got him a new printer as a surprise (the Canon died a horrible death) and got it installed the day before yesterday. HAHAHA! Yeah. Real funny. I'm just not believing this. Sigh. I have a real sneaking suspicion when I go to the Big House to look at Da's pc I'm not gonna exactly have loving feelings toward it. I think it's gonna be more like You know how you get those feelings of impending doom? Uh-huh. I'll do the best I can of course and I've already made up my mind. I can't fix it, I'm giving him my laptop. Seriously! It's just a thing and it's not like losing a family member -- which of course includes all the animals. And we can pitch his pc, I don't give a damn. Wait! Nope, I don't.

Uh-oh, Legs wants to go outside -- or as we call it it's the so I need to let her out, hopefully for the last time tonight, and look! It's still dark! Sometimes it's the ass-crack of dawn when she goes out for the "last time."

Wish me sweet dreams ... at some point.

Counting Down the Days

Happy Stay Out Of The Sun Day and Compliment Your Mirror Day! I kid you not, those are real holidays -- bizarre though they might be, they still count.

Several of my friends are on vacation. Another is leaving on Thursday. I would have been leaving here in just a few days but something came up and I must meet a commitment on the morning of 14 July -- very early in the morning, as soon as the joint opens and then I'm doing my business and I'm gonna sky outta there, check into my hotel and hopefully take a nap before the Dwight Yoakam concert at 9.00 PM. So instead of having a few days away before the concert, I'm having them after. And it's a funny thing because I got an offer last week from the Horseshoe Casino: One free night and a $15 slot coupon. Woo-hoo! It's good for the entire month of July so last Friday I got online, made a reservation for the Horseshoe and I extended my stay another day. So today I'm in Jackson, running a bunch of errands, I see Cindi, I have to get Lovey serviced and I'm gone like seven hours. I get back, feed the horseys and go up to the Big House. Guess what I got in the mail? Yet another offer from the Horseshoe! Another free night's stay and a $10 slot coupon! That's $25! Unfortunately, the free room expires on 13 July -- clearly they're trying to suck me in, get me to come down there sooner! Well ... Are you kidding? Of course I can be bought, and I'd go down there were it not for this thing I have to do on the morning of the 14th. Trust me. But I can still use the slot coupon, but here's the thing: I'm not even really a Slot Machine Girl. I like Blackjack -- but the keep sending me these coupons for slot play and actually, I've not done too shabby. But the offers keep coming in the mail ... It's like And who can resist?

I've had a headache off and on for several days. It's not too bad, it just feels like but otherwise I'm doing well. Maybe I can devote a little more time to my pool even tomorrow! We're cooking out and since it's a holiday I don't think anyone will be trudging around the garden -- which reminds me! You should see all my Sugar Baby watermelons! I can't wait! But Daddy's canteloupe are going crazy. Seriously, there is no way we could hope to consume all those -- fortunately, we have lots of friends who will help us out w/ our little problem.

Have you heard the lastest? NASA gets into the holiday spirit and plans fireworks for the 4th of July -- despite this headline: Impact of Foam Crack On Shuttle Launch Still Uncertain. I heard yesterday on MSNBC a former astronaut say under the best possible circumstances those aboard the Discovery know there's a one-in-ten chance of returning to earth alive and well, but of course they're willing to risk their lives. While I don't understand those odds, I'm perfectly baffled why NASA would let that bird fly if the foam is cracked, and they aren't quite sure what impact it will have on Discovery. If they have a one-in-ten chance of survival when NASA believes everything is working perfectly -- what in hell are they thinking? I guess if she flies tomorrow we'll find out how the cracked foam affected her. Does anyone remember Columbia? If that wasn't horrifying, I can't imagine what was. Tune in tomorrow at 1.37 PM Central time. That's liftoff for Discovery.

Once upon a time, Son of Sam bought Pirates of The Caribbean: The Curse of The Black Pearl and even though it starred one of my favorites, Johnny Depp I was no more interested in watching that than I'd enjoy shaving my head. Finally he talked me into watching it and I loved it! Okay, all of this was a little unnerving at first but I loved the movie so much I bought the same DVD except it's the collector's edition, a 2 disc set. Next is the release of and we can only hope that will answer the question we've all been asking: Yeah, baby! Johnny Depp is soo gorgeous! And don't forget another holiday: 19 September is Talk Like a Pirate Day. It's a fact, it really is! But it's more like Barbosa than Captain Jack Sparrow. Did you know Johnny Depp actually has a sparrow tattoo that's visible in the movie? Check it out!

Finally, if you're traveling around Tennessee over this four day holiday beware! Friday and today I saw so much law enforcement I lost count of the vehicles. And Tennessee takes traffic and holidays very seriously. Don't believe me? Observe:

See what I mean?

Later~