A Cold Sunday

It's very cold, about sixty degrees which is unheard of this time of year in the South. Brrrr! It's wet and cold, tomorrow it'll be seventy degrees and then on Tuesday it's supposed to be more like normal, in the mid-seventies. This weather totally and I tell you truly, I am about tired of all the and chilly weather!

Let us turn our attention to something gorgeous:



Yup, there he is! Only ... two long months, thirteen neverending days to go ... *sigh* Clearly, the counter was not a good idea -- at least this early in the game. The ... time ... seems ... to ... slowly ... creep ... by ...
*SCREAM!*

I know this is late but I got sidetracked. You can bear this in mind for next Easter. What to do w/ all those annoying little Peeps? Make this:



Moo Goo Gai Peep ... or maybe it's Peep Foo Yung. I'm not sure. I find Peeps quite ... distracting. Clearly, they must go!

In the news today:

They're livin' it up in Skullbone! Brr, it was a cold weekend for the sixth annual bike rally but no one under 18 is allowed to attend, and for good reason:
SKULLBONE - At first glance, the scene at Skullbone Music Park on Saturday afternoon might have appeared to be just another giant festival, complete with bands, funnel cake, hot dog vendors and merchants.
But look closer, and the rally also resembled Mardi Gras, with men giving women bead necklaces to flash their breasts. There was also a whipped cream wrestling match.
A crowd gathers to watch as 'Crunch' burns out his back tire Saturday during the sixth annual Skullbone Bike Rally at Skullbone Music Park.

Now, if you can point out 'Crunch' in that crowd I got a ten dollar bill w/ your name on it. Good luck!
SKULLBONE

Apparently there was much fun to be had at Trenton's 26th Annual Teapot Festival. It was "Steeped in Tradition" and I'm missing it all. Including the traditional "Lighting of The Teapots." Oh jeez ...

TEAPOTS

The third anniversary of a tornado that did enormous damage not only to Lexington but Jackson, TN as well is coming up:

47 Minutes until midnight
The day the night sky fell
4 May, 2003

Images from Lexington:

Workers at the Henderson Chester Farmers Co-op remove debris from the collapsed building on Tuesday afternoon in Lexington. The co-op is one of many buildings inflicted with heavy damage from Sunday night's tornadoes.


The McDonald's golden arches show the strain of withstanding Sunday night's tornadoes on W. Church Street in downtown Lexington on Tuesday.

Mike Jones, owner of the Major Market in Lexington, talks on the phone on Tuesday afternoon in front of his store destroyed by Sunday night's storms. Jones spent Tuesday waiting for the arrival of insurance adjusters.

Pope Subdivision across from Johnson Controls on Natchez Trace Drive was absolutely obliterated in this storm. I remember this clearly: McDonalds got their arches unwrinkled, Co-Op built a fine facility on Hwy. 22 and that dinky little Major Market is now a brand spanking new BP station down by Nick's restaurant.

This isn't local but Keith Richards was injured after apparently falling out of a palm tree on Fiji, and is hospitalized w/ a mild concussion.

Poor Keef. He's been dead for years, he just doesn't know it yet. But there are conflicting reports about his injury. Another story goes "Richards, 62, got on a Jet Ski after the fall and had another accident."
KEEF

Not to worry about the dinner party last night -- Mom cancelled. She's not been sleeping well she says, and since Bruce and Tonya "can't ever make it at a decent hour" she decided against it. Bruce works on Saturdays and he can't do his work -- washing semi's -- until they begin arriving around noon, so they usually want to dine around 6.30 pm. But they're always late, and that's the root of Mom's problem. Some people are always late and Bruce and Tonya are a couple of those people. Earlier we discussed the situation -- remember how totally aggravated we've all been w/ each other lately:
Mom: Bruce and Tonya are supposed to be here at 6.30 but we all know they won't come dragging in until 6.45 - 7.00. But we are sitting down at 6.30, regardless! That will teach them to arrive on time!
Samantha: Mom, are you nuts? You're fixin' to punish guests you've invited to dinner?
M: NO! I am just sick and tired of them dragging in when they get around it, it's never at a decent hour, and then I ending up doing dishes all night! We will sit down promptly at 6.30, I said!
S: Well, don't expect me to do that. That's just about the most obsurd thing I've ever heard! Calm down, take a load off, don't sweat it, okay? There's nothing to worry about.
M: If they cannot arrive at a decent hour, we'll eat w/out them.
S: Look, I'm not even coming to dinner that night, okay? There's simply too much tension between all of us lately.

Well, the parents just returned from having lunch out. Mom sent Daddy over w/ a message that completely ticked me off. But, being angry it's time for me to post this.

Now I'm Hungry

I am. I might be forced to make a run to Subway tonight -- that's how hungry I am. I'd intended to go to the market today but my eyeball hurt so I didn't and my cupboard is totally bare. I've even been out of milk for three days -- which is unheard of for me. Milk is my lifeblood, trust me. On the up side, my eyeball is fine now. I slept this afternoon and when I awoke all pain was gone! What a relief -- that scared me. Snickers is fine and so am I, and it's all good news.

Guess what time it is? That's right, my



Not a great photo but he's still hot. YEEHAW! Only two and a half months to go ... I got my ticket in the mail today from TicketMaster! WOO-HOO! I put it on my credit card (which, of course, Mama will end up paying for, bless her!). But, it all comes out in the wash -- as it were. Recently, I got them two Miracle Foam pillows because I so love mine and theirs are deader than dead. Sometimes I find her stuff on eBay that she'd like but all the receipts, etc. is getting confusing over here because neither one of us can remember what I bought, what she bought, what comes out of either account and so on. Just yesterday she ran across a receipt and said she needed to deduct that from her checking account because it was a debit, correct? I said yes, but it came out of my account, not hers because it was an eBay item. The thing is, if we buy stuff from the toll-free number on TV it's even more expensive so I always try to hunt it down on eBay and saves us a bundle. Some stuff it would be advantageous to purchase in a store -- such as the pillows, cause you want to know exactly what you're getting but other stuff (such as Coach handbags for $4.44 -- LOL!) it's pretty safe.

On to the news:

My carrots are finally germinated and popping their little greens up! The horseys will be thrilled although Snickers is the only one who eats the whole carrot (and he's a finicky eater) while the other two only eat the carrot tops. No sign of the Sugar Babies though so I figure I'll have to buy some plants to put in. Not a big deal though, for me. For the first time since I've been here we got our garden planted before Mr. Tomato Man! When you come around the curve and look down on his garden the soil looks ... pale? Ours is black, but full of that ornerous "black gold": Horsey poo. The soil here is a red clay-like mixture which makes you wonder how anything grows in it, and not surprised when it doesn't. And Mr. Iris Man on Natchez Trace Drive has all his Iris's up now. They're very pretty but why anyone would want a square garden full of Iris is beyond me. They bloom in the spring and then they're done.

The Henderson County Rescue Squad began searching on Tuesday for a man who went fishing in Browns Creek Lake (which is so close I could spit at it) that morning and never returned home. They had to suspend operations when a bad storm moved through here that evening but have continued to search ever since. They recovered the man's vehicle and boat which was floating in the lake but as yet there's no sign of him. A witness told authorities that a man was seen fishing out of the boat in the lake earlier that day so no one is expecting this to turn out well. His name hasn't been released because all his family members have yet to be notified of the search. Sad.


There have been lots more boats and divers out there looking for him than that.

Also Tuesday night, the storm hit Trenton, TN hard! Straight-line winds uprooted trees and downed power lines. People found themselves trapped in their homes or vehicles because of trees landing on them. Clean up continues however, and the much-ballyhooed Annual Trenton Teapot Festival will proceed on Saturday. Oh boy!


My oral surgeon, Dr. Mark Harper lives and works in Trenton. He did my DaVinci Veneers and he is sooo gorgeous! (He didn't help matters any by greeting me w/ "Hello, gorgeous!") I've always worried about what I may have said to him while under anesthetic, and I once asked him. He said, "Let's put it this way: I know everything about your horses now." I hope all I talked about was the horses ... *sigh* Anyway, to my horror Dr. Mark gets into that whole Teapot thing. He even has antique teapots and if I were to go to Trenton tomorrow, there's not a doubt in my mind I'd find him. Maybe I could sing "I'm a Little Teapot" to him like I always threatened to do ... Unless I've already done it while under the influence.

This is disturbing:

"SMYRNA, Tenn. (AP) -- Eva Guerra said the last time she saw her 2-year-old daughter was Sunday night. When she woke at 4 a.m. her daughter was gone and the door to her apartment unlocked.
Now the toddler has been missing for nearly five days. Police are continuing to search for her, and they are still interviewing family and neighbors about her disappearance.
But a Smyrna police spokesman said Friday they are getting contradictory stories from the mother.
'Some of the things we heard previously, the stories aren't matching up,' Sgt. Ken Hampton said."

That baby has been missing for five days, and she's only 28 months old! Look at her precious little face, hopefully she'll be recovered and soon!
ANALYCE

And here is her photo:


I'm praying she'll be recovered safely, happy and healthy.

The Annual Whine and Dine @ Bumpus Harley Davidson is tomorrow night, and tickets are $50 -- an extremely worthy cause as it benefits the Madison County Humane Society. There will be a wine tasting, coffee bar, heavy hors d'oeuvres and entertainment so you must be 21 to attend. I'm far better off donating money and not attending for two reasons: 1) I couldn't bear leaving all the pets there and would want to bring every single one home and, 2) The entertainment will be music by the band The Krawlin' Kingsnakes. Need I say more? Personally, I've not had the pleasure of hearing The Krawlin' Kingsnakes ... But they scare me anyway.

I had no idea but it seems dance classes are held weekly at the Rockabilly Hall of Fame in Jackson, TN -- or, as we refer to it "Carl Perkins World." If you dig Carl, go get your fix.

Also this weekend if you're not tempted by anything else, there's always the Taste of Weakley and Obion Counties. I know Weakley and Obion Counties therefore I will not be attending.

This morning soon after I awoke I was talking to my mom and this is an example of how tense things have been around here lately. Mom is loud by nature, even louder and more shrill when she's angry:
Samantha: I've decided to begin the garage sale at 6.00 am this time instead of 7.00 because most begin at 7.00 and I want them to come here first. The last time they were all lined up and down the road at 6.30!
Mom: No, you're going to start it at 7.00!
S: I just think that's the best option for me. And I'm going to have it Friday and Saturday as usual.
M: Now I know you've lost it! Everyone works on Friday, just have it Saturday! Open at 7.00 in the morning!
S: Mom ... I know I've aggravated you this whole past week and I'm sorry for whatever is wrong (which is, she's mad because I haven't caved in every time someone thinks I should do this or that. We've been working on garage sale stuff and Mom thinks this should be pitched or that should be pitched and I've refused. Daddy told me to DO WHAT I WANT, it's my stuff.) but I hate the tension between us, and I can't stop whatever I'm doing to annoy you unless you tell me what it is.
M: I'm not discussing it!
S: Well, I wish you would so we could eliminate it.
M: Okay! You want to know what's wrong? I'll tell you what's wrong! It's just that you're so pushy!! (I almost fainted when she said that.) Pushy, pushy, pushy! Everythinig has to be your way and I'm sick and tired of it! THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG!!
I paused, collected myself and quietly said, "Well, I'm sorry you see things that way because it appears I will not be able to 'fix it.' We've been sorting out boxes for the sale Mom, and about the timing of the sale -- you do know I've had about a dozen of these, right? I think I know best when to have it, but I require nothing of you so please don't feel you must schlepp over here in your jammies to help me. I'll be just fine!"
M: DO WHATEVER YOU WANT!
She hung up on me . Later on I calmly told her I'd have to take a raincheck on dinner tomorrow evening. She's having another couple -- Bruce and Tonya, as well as Justin and Baby Vance to dinner -- and as much as I love all of them, I told her I wouldn't be coming after all, the tension is just too much for me. She shrieked, "FINE! Do what you want, I don't care!!" But I gotta tell you, I've never heard her like this before. I know it's the sale, it's the fact that my poor mama has done forty-eleven loads of laundry, washing all the gazillion items of clothing I no longer want/need, etc. and I don't know what to do w/ her but yesterday at my session w/ Cindi she reminded me I need to calm down, take deep breaths and not lose my temper - which I've had no luck whatsoever in doing which causes the tension between us. Neither of us is willing to cave. I realize it's just tension and I'm the worst offender. I can't handle tension at all!

And here's something else: When Daddy and I were working on the boxes of Stuff he found the one that contained my dinnerware and other kitchen stuff -- my porcelain cows, etc. He commented, "Oh well we don't even have to open that one, you want that stuff, right?" That was when I realized Daddy was gonna be really cool about this! I thought he was gonna hardball me at every turn! A couple of days later Mom noticed the dinnerware box and asked why it hadn't been opened yet. I replied that because we know what's in there and it's a Keeper we'll just put it in the loft. She said since I obviously don't have room for it now later on I can buy whatever I want when I do have room for it but I don't really want to do that. But I really want my Stuff -- at least some of my Stuff! Later I was outside chasing a little toady so Legs wouldn't get it. (She loves toads, just holds them in her mouth -- yuck!) I was thinking maybe I should just give all that Calphalon to my mom -- but Daddy told us both, "It's Sami's stuff, she can keep it if she wants to." But I'm really torn about it: Mom buys these sets of cookware for $10 at Wally World and then wonders why they don't last? She does this every three or four months and I've told her a hundred times: If she'd bite the bullet one time and buy decent cookware that would be it. She'd never have to buy another set. To prove my point, two years ago I bought her a Calphalon skillet. I got it on sale -- it's very large -- but still cost around $100. I proved my point alright! She'll never have to replace that puppy! I know it's a long story but that is why everyone's been so aggravated at everyone all week. It would serve us well to listen to something my mom always says: "It'll all turn out fine!" Because it always does! There's been a lot of tension over what goes and what stays and the general disaster that is Daddy's shop (the poor soul is so tolerant of me!)and oh my stars, the gazillion loads of laundry that's had to be done but it's not been totally w/out rewards. I told both of them upfront: If they see something they want, grab it. Daddy nailed him some tools right off the bat, and I can't begin to list everything Mom's taken home w/ her which is as it should be. If she even starts that stuff of, "I'm going to pay you for this," I'm gonna lay her flat out! LOL!!

Which reminds me: Thursday night is Daddy/Daughter night. I go over to the Big House and we watch Survivor together, yelling about the injustices or how much we dislike different contestants. It's fun! But while I was over there he asked me what kind of price I was going to put on my little 13" color TV I kept in the kitchen and the self-propelled lawn mower that was only used like three times. I said I didn't have a clue and asked him why? He said the Duck was interested. I replied, "You tell the Duck to give me whatever he feels is fair. It's hard taking money from him." The Duck is Daddy's best friend, and I adore him! But I do know he wouldn't permit me to just give anything to him. The Duck is fair. If I had my way, I'd throw that stuff in the pick up and just take them to the Duck's house, F.O.C. (Free Of Charge) but I know that's not happening.

I need to find food. Or something. This is enough boring material for one night.

Later --

I Poked My Eyeball

I did, and it hurts. My Snickerdoodle has been off his feed since last Saturday evening when I fed him. At first he munchied a little but since then he's just turned up his nose. I began giving him more sweet feed w/ his oats until now it's come to straight sweet feed but as of this morning it was still no go. He did however continue eating treats, and consumed as much hay as he could get. Had he stopped eating entirely he'd already been at the vet at Huntingdon (I don't use the moron large animal vet here anymore, ever since my mare knocked him on his butt because -- I warned him!) but since he ate hay like it was his last meal on the Titanic I didn't have to worry about indigestion problems -- termed "colic" in horses, and they can/do die from it. I almost lost Snickerdoodle two years ago due to colic but I took him to Memphis to a vet who treats Kentucky Thoroughbreds -- Smarty Jones is a patient -- and she saved his life. So this evening I go to the stable to feed the Horseys. I'd given him some apple treats (which are also high-vitamin) to hopefully get his mouth watering previous to that but it hadn't worked before. So I put a little sweet feed in his bowl and went about my business as he stood there blinking at me. He wanted more cookies. "More cookies, Mom! Come on, you love me ... " I've heard it before and ignored him ... And he turned to his bowl and began eating! I began sobbing (naturally) because 1) I was happy because tomorrow was Vet Day for me, and 2) My mom was in the stable w/ me and has been very sympathetic to my fears about Snickers. So I didn't move while he was eating -- I didn't want to distract him from his dinner -- and he got down ... oh, better than half a regular meal for him. I was so happy! Once he finished I got hay to put out for them and -- duh! -- I walked right up to a bale, and a big, thick piece poked me in my right eyeball. Man! It hurts like the dog! Now I'm all worried about it because I had LASIK and I'm seriously considering the E.R. tomorrow. I put the lubricating drops in it about a gazillion times and it hurts less when it's closed -- blinking irritates it. But, the good news is my Big Man is eating again and I don't have to haul his big old butt to Huntingdon to the vet tomorrow! Here's his big old face:
And here's his big old butt:
Did I not mention his big old butt?

Of course, there's the baby, Cosmo:
I love his Baby Nose!

And his mama, Sassafras:

I'm almost afraid to mention it, but she's been in a very sweet mood for about six weeks now. Usually when she gets PMS she gets nippy. Did I say nippy? I meant she chomps on my Snickers.

Speaking of photos, I simply must make mention of my heart throb:
Oh, myyyyyyyyyyy ... You know, it occurs to me that the counter above says two months, sixteen days. I'm screaming on the inside but I'm also thinking I'm gonna have to locate a whole lot more images.

My eyeball hurts. I have to lie down and mash it into the pillow so I can keep it closed. I have news, but it's gonna have to wait till tomorrow. 'K?

Later --

I Am Freezing!!

God bless my daddy. But for heaven's sake -- he didn't have to go over to babysit Uncle Steve until 6.00 this morning and apparently his truck keys were in his pocket and got squished when he put on his shoes. So the alarm went off and because my windows were still open it woke me up. Oh, me. But it's so cold here I'm actually wearing a jacket inside the house. I absolutely refuse to turn the heat back on! It's 55 degrees outside -- Brrrrrrr! Remember, it was 91 degrees two days last week and mid-80s ever since ... until now. It'll be in the 70s for the next few days w/ more rain in the forecast and that's fine ... as long as I see no hideous centipedes. Putrid!

I actually made coffee this morning -- but not because I woke up so dang early. I'm not quite sure why I did that. A lot of things have changed about me but I don't know why. Making coffee first thing in the morning is no longer my habit and instead I might do it maybe once a week. (But I still only drink maybe two cups when I do.) I've become a lighter sleeper -- which, in the past when I lived alone I was always more "aware" of sounds at night but not on the ranch, never. This is light sleep. Previously, Daddy could have parked right next to my window and blasted his horn and it wouldn't have woke me up. I'm safe and secure here plus my entire life I've been a very deep sleeper. I don't know what's going on w/ me ... I guess I'm getting old. Oh! This is funny but it's also true: My son inherited deep sleeping from me and he so dislikes the sound of the vacuum that I'd wait until he was asleep in the mornings to sweep his bedroom. Truly! It didn't annoy him because he was asleep, and he never even twitched. That's what I call a very deep sleeper. Again, he was safe and secure so he slept well. Anyway, there have been lots of changes w/ me but I don't know why. I don't take my last dose of Ritalin in the evenings, I don't consume caffeine after the two cups of coffee -- if I even have coffee -- and I don't know what's going on w/ me. Strange. Lifelong (practically) habits are out the window anymore, and not for the better, either. Hate it, hate it, hate it. I see Cindi tomorow @ 1.00 and maybe we need to talk about that because all this really does concern me. It's not just the light sleeping and not making coffee. It goes far beyond that.

Now it's time for ... My current



Truth be told, I have many but right now he's strongly on my mind. Concerts are just so much fun. They're exciting, they're thrilling, an experience like none other. I can't wait ... But from the looks of the counter I'm gonna have to. *pout* Waiting is agonizing as always ...

It's almost 10.00 and Mom's first soap will be over so she'll want to work on my stuff out in the shop. I have some news about that but I'll post it later -- Dang.

More later --

Chilly Morning, Hot Afternoon

I can't start a post w/out a photo of my current source of hotness. And now that I hae the countdown going we can all be aware of when I see him in concert. Yeehaw!! Damn skippy, even if I do say so myself.

The second thing I have to do is wish Evil Cousin a very happy birthday:



HAPPY BIRTHDAY CRUSTY!!
Yes, I am wonderful and no, she doesn't deserve me. Hehehe ... Yes, I can gloat because I know she doesn't know HTML and I do!

It rained this morning and it was pretty cool outside and inside w/ all the windows open. But then this afternoon the sun popped out and it became warm and very humid. Now, at 8.00 pm the temps dropping and severe storms are headed our way. Daddy said Slim Pickens predicted 2" diameter hail, so Mom made him put even her car in. We've sort of switched things around: Daddy's pick up and the SUV go in the garage, Nathan is inside and tonight he moved Nathan so he could get Mom's aircraft carrier in -- yeah, the U.S.S. Nimitz. She bought it w/ hail damage so it can't hurt it unless it breaks a window. Even more tension on the homefront: Uncle Steve is in a wheelchair. His right leg and arm are still paralyzed, and he doesn't speak much. He's not changed since he came home from the hospital except maybe he's picked up a few more words. Aunt Pat insists someone be w/ him 24/7, so Daddy is the one who usually goes over of a morning at 4.45 am to sit and watch Uncle Steve sleep until Tara finally gets there at ... Well, when she gets there. Daddy is supposed to be at work w/ the Duck at 8.00 but often doesn't make it. Tara tends to oversleep, I'm told -- despite the kids having to go to school. (When I was in school, if you were late so many times per quarter you got detention.) Anyway, Mom is tired of Daddy's babysitting duties so she gets upset when he's summoned over there, whether it's staying until Tara shows up or loading up the camper to set it up at the campgrounds or bringing it back or -- anything! Daddy said he'd do whatever was needed, and he's a man of his word which is very, very admirable but when do you cut the umbillical cord -- as it were? I'm proud of him for being an admirable man but this just can't go on forever. My parents can't vacation, they can't even go away for the day because Daddy might be needed across the road. It's gone beyond the ridiculous!

For my part, unfortunately my feelings toward my uncle have changed and now I have little sympathy. I hate that about myself!! It seems three years ago when my father went over to my aunt and uncle's to talk w/ them about the whole "Retire early, Russ, so we can go fishing!!" deal, and the subsequent ignoring of my father ever since in lieu of Greg, Uncle Steve looked my daddy in the eyeball and said, "Well Russ, you'll just have to make new friends." And that was it. Daddy carried that around inside him for three -- is it four years? He never told a soul exactly what went on that night and I remember it as though it was yesterday because he admitted breaking down in front of them so it really stuck in my mind. Well here a few weeks ago we had guests for dinner one evening and Daddy related that story and slipped by telling all of it this time. I was so furious I asked to be excused in the middle of dinner. Sadly, that infuriation has subsided very little over the past few weeks, and that makes me very sad. I love my aunt and uncle but that was absolutely inexcusable -- not to mention, heartless and cruel. I could go on, but it's beginning to lightning and get really nasty here -- Slim Pickens just told us on TV so that means it's time to shut Blackie down for awhile.

More later --

And Now It's Monday Night!

Okay. So here's the deal: I published that post all of three minutes ago and it's my habit to take a gander to make sure it looks okay. If it doesn't, sometimes I change it, sometimes I shrug my shoulders and say, "Forget about it." But what happened tonight was absolutely horrifying! My photo of Dwight Yoakam is covered in words -- previous posts, links, that annoying little Weather Pixie who should die anyway, etc. Now, I can't have that so let us talk. About anything.

Speaking of weather, we've had so many torrential rains I'm just waiting for *shudder* those horrible *shudder* centipedes to arrive! Wanna see a photo? I'll locate one -- a small one -- so you too can enjoy and hopefully have the nightmares I've had previously.












Yeah! Kill me now, okay? A year ago they were everywhere! I mean, they were everywhere outside -- I still live here, don't I? Trust me, I'd have burned this joint down if they had made their way inside! So, what got me to thinking about the stinkin' centipedes was this article:
Mormon Crickets Invade to Survive
I kid you not.

And the weather forecast has changed!
Currently:
71°F
Mostly Cloudy
Wind: N at 0 mph
Humidity: 84%
Today
Chance of Storms
82° | 63°
Tue
Thunderstorms
80° | 48°
Wed
Mostly Sunny
59° | 41°
Thu
Mostly Sunny
71° | 40°

From the News of The Weird File:
Man glues hands and mouths of hostages
That is so not funny ... Do you ever have those Schadenfreude moments? I just had one.

From the same file:
Woman nabbed driving corpse across country
But no Schadenfreude moment this time. Just the willies. But I urge you to read the article because it sounds exactly like something my mom would do. If you know my mom, you know I'm right.

And I may as well admit this while I'm at it: I am so tired of hearing about the Natalee Holloway disappearance, and sick to death of the Duke Lacrosse players case. I'm truly sorry both events occurred but oh my stars! Hasn't there been anything else newsworthy in all this time?

Note to 5elf #5:
The next time I do laundry I must ensure that the box of Arm & Hammer I use is detergent, not cat litter.
That was embarrassing.

I hope this takes care of my current hottie/heart throb because it's far beyond time for bed. The horseys think they need to be fed at the ass-crack of dawn, you know.

Later --

It's Monday

I am loving Mr. Laptop! Now that we appear to be completely updated (at last!) we've been having lots of fun! For example, I'm fixing to see a certain hottie in concert in July. Can you guess who? Here's a hint:

That's right fellow babies, I'm gonna see him in all his glory and long's he doesn't take that cowboy hat off, I'll be just fiiiiiiiiiiiiiine! Be still my beating heart!
In fact, I'll see him at


which is inside


Believe it or not, I've never been to Sam's Town -- for some reason it didn't appealing to me so I've never been. This will be a new experience and since I'm going in July I will definitely be enjoying this for a few days:


YEEHAW!! Let the good times roll!

That was this afternoon and now this is evening. Blogger went down to do maintenance and I've been impatiently waiting to spread the good news ever since. Or maybe I've been waiting to gloat. Yeah, that sounds a lot more like me.

Anyone wanna see another photo of Mr. Laptop again? No? Okay, how about Gerald!! I know Sharmy adores Gerald so this is for her:




"I have come to collect your walnut of a soul you traded for the fun with the Daytime Hooker."


As you reach for the whiskey, you realize Artie is on the 13th Step - Evisceration Therapy.

You know ... There's something about the above hottie that reminds me of my son. Nothing about his looks, because my son looks like me -- I think it's just that he's so cool and exudes confidence, whether he feels it or not. Especially holding the guitar -- I don't know, there's just something there. I can't put my finger on it.

In the news, Arsenal defender Sol Campbell will replace Philippe Senderos in the Champions League semi-final second leg.
ARSENAL

This has to be in my Top Ten Weird Celebrity Events of this year -- No, make that Top Five: Denise Richards and Richie Sambora hook up. While not yet divorced from their spouses, by the way.

WE'RE MORONS

It's said that Angelina Jolie wants to give birth in Nambia and she and Brad Pitt have released a statement.

LEAVE US ALONE
You thought I was kidding, didn't you? Nope. That's what they said.

Here's something I should probably stay far, far away from: EBay Launches Online Store to Sell Items.
STORY
eBay Express
Clearly, this is not good news: I just clicked the link for the new store and it already has my account information!! It read, "Welcome Samantha!" I'm in dire trouble now. This can't be good. On the other hand, way to cut to the chase, eBay! Leave it to them to find yet another way to monopolize the market.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch ...
The garden is growing very fast! Everything began popping up in 3-5 days after being planted! We have:
Green beans
Canteloupe
Spring onions
Cucumbers which Da refers to as "pickles"
Red radishes
Sugar Baby watermelon
Hot yellow peppers
Jet Star tomatoes
Bell peppers
Carrots which are just for my horseys
And I think that's it. Daddy and I took two Jet Stars over to Miss Pauline's and planted them for her along w/ a healthy batch of horsey poo. I am so hoping they do well for her! If they don't you know what I'm gonna do, right? I'll sneak over there in the middle of the night and place fat, ripe tomatoes from our garden around her plants and maybe she'll think they just fell off the vines? James plants about a dozen but he doesn't tend them very well nor does he get the Jet Star which I swear by for tons of fruit! I love the Brandywine and others for taste, but those Jet Stars were still bearing fruit when I lived in Utah and it was snowing! Also, my parents preacher Arthuritis has a birthday this week. The congregation (perhaps 40 in total) took up a collection and got him a gift card from Penney's because that's where he likes to buy his clothes. But my mom also presented to him 4 hot banana pepper plants. She added, "Sami said she'd rake up some horse poo for you if you want to come over and get it." I also said, "Too bad Artie is so prissy, some horsey poo would do those plants some real good." Sheesh. But she didn't tell him that. Anyway, everything germinated in our garden very fast this year -- except for the carrot and watermelon seeds. I'm ticked. It's rained and rained and rained here, we've had two days w/out rain and tomorrow we're expecting more which will drop the temps down from 85 to 75 degrees. The thing is, you can't get into the garden to thin Da's radishes else you'll sink to your ankles in mud! And of course, poo.

Check this out:



You see that butterfly? I obtained that photo from our newspaper website:
LEXINGTON PROGRESS
When I went down Saturday evening to feed the horseys I noticed a cluster of more than thirty of those butterflies at the edge of the garden. I studied on them for quite awhile but I never did figure out what the deal was w/ them. I then tried to locate information online but no go. If anyone knows the species, please let me know? It's making me crazy not knowing. Here's another photo:

I hope someone knows something about them because those goomers are about to drive me nuts! They're all over the flowers down here ... But what were they doing in the garden together? Ah ... They were planning world domination! Now I know the species: The Terrorist Swallowfly!

Okay I'm getting tired and stupid so I'm headed to bed. Goodnight!

I'm Speechless

Not often do I find myself w/out words but I have been since the day before yesterday. I tried to get online w/ Old Grumpy and ... the modem failed! I was forced to then open the box and get the new baby out! *SCREAM* It's gorgeous -- I didn't even look at it in the store -- it's shiny black so no more of the matte grey keyboard/casing, the built-in crappy speakers are marvelous, not crappy, it runs a once montly "health check" to see if it feels good, it's lightning-quick even w/ the dial up, the keyboard is of course bouncy, it's very quiet -- well, I could just go on and on and on! I'm speechless. I thought Old Grumpy was smart but compared to this fella he's a nitwit. It's amazing because in two years this one will be a nitwit. No, that's sad! I'm wondering if I could just rent one for $500-$600 per year and still be ahead of the game? Of course we don't do that. We pay out the nose for the privilege of having yet more Stuff.

Speaking of Stuff: Mom has been helping me in the shop to get rid of my Stuff. I get to keep my Craft Stuff which surprised me window treatments, holiday decorations, all the Stuff that makes a home is outta here. We're having a Garage Sale Under Protest after I go through all my Stuff. Every time I go out the door I get depressed about it. At least Daddy said I can keep my Craft Stuff which was indeed surprising.

We have the garden in! It took three days from tilling the horsey poo in to finish and we already have two veggies popping up! The radishes and "pickles" as Da calls them (he's so cute!) -- the cucumbers. We planted 32 Jet Star tomato plants, 18 hot banana peppers, 12 bell peppers and the rest were seeds. Radishes, "pickles," carrots for my horses, canteloupe, Sugar Baby watermelon, green beans, spring onions ... my mind just went blank! I can't remember what else is down there however, I'm just dying to see what herbs come up from last year. A bunch of them were coming up when my dad went down there to till them under. I tried to tell him ... No one ever listens to me.

Some changes in this little town -- some good, some bad: Cigs and Suds down by Huddle House has been gone for three months. Directly across the street from Huddle House was a crappy old restaurant building they finally dozed and now it's a shop for the truck dealership on the other corner across from Huddle House. So it's been busy down there. The body piercing place on Natchez Trace Drive is not only out of business but they up and took their trailer outta there. Mr. Griggs is still battling for business against Wally World, as evidenced by his weekly sale bills. As far as anyone can tell his market is doing just fine however, doesn't anybody need to worry about Mr. Griggs. He owns much of the commercial real estate around here and it turns out he did every single thing in his power to prevent the Wally World SuperCenter from coming in here. He's on Building Commissions, etc. and it makes sense because he basically had a monopoly on the grocery customers in this town. There are other markets but -- incredibly -- his was the best even though it's very small.

I've been looking at ... *SCREAM* ... new cars. I don't want to, I detest the thought of it, I'd rather take a beatin' than buy a new car. However, only a fool would be ill-prepared for the inevitable which is, Nathan's days are numbered poor girl and I simply must have another economical, small vehicle. So I've been looking at all the imports -- much to my father's chagrin -- and I believe I might go Suzuki. I have some time -- I hope I have lots of time to think and list all the pros and cons of each but right now it's looking like Suzuki. But I'm not sure.

Tomorrow my Dwight Yoakam tickets go on sale -- WOO-HOO! I'm tickled. I'd thought about going to Pigeon Forge to see him but that's tomorrow (it sneaked up on me, I thought it was in JULY) so that's out of the question. So I'll see him in Tunica ... which will be really painful for me, you know having to be at a casino, being around all those cowboys and that. *snicker* Be still my beating heart!
Trust me, if there's one man over all others who makes my heart go pitty pat it's him. Oh man ... On to another subject -- fast!

I have to get ready to get out of here now. I have an appointment w/ Dr. Winston at 3.15 which means he'll get around to me around 4.00-4.30. I hate that.

More later --

This is Some Wild News!

Unbelievable. In the past week I've bought a new TV, printer/scanner/copier and other various electronics. And then my spacebar jammed on Old Grumpy -- so I replaced him! That's right! You've heard the rumors and it's true -- I have a new baby in my house!
HP Pavilion Notebook PC
• AMD Turion® 64 ML-32
• 100GB hard drive
• 15.4" WXGA widescreen
• Double-layer DVD+R/RW
• 1024MB of DDR memory
• LightScribe technology

Feature

The basics: This notebook features the 1.8GHz AMD Turion® 64 ML-32 processor, 1024MB of 333MHz DDR memory as well as an 100GB 4200RPM hard drive.

Bright display: The 15.4" WXGA high-definition screen displays an 18% larger picture than standard 15" screens, and offers up to an 18% improvement in contrast ratio. Enjoy bright razor-sharp graphics and plenty of room for your widescreen movies.

Combo drive with LightScribe: The double-layer DVD+/-RW drive records up to 8.5GB of information on just one double-layer disc. LightScribe laser-etches beautiful images onto your discs with the same drive that burns the data.

Designed to entertain: The built-in Altec Lansing speakers and ATI Radeon® Xpress 200M IGP graphics card will bring your music, games and movies to life.

Instant cinema to go: Enjoy digital film and music within seconds with the press of the external buttons and HP QuickPlay. The included wireless remote and stereo earbud headphones will elevate your experience.

6-in-1 media card reader: Enjoy seamless video and photo transfers with your camcorder and camera. This card reader accepts Secure Digital, MultiMediaCard, Memory Stick, Memory Stick Pro, SmartMedia and xD cards.

ExpressCard/54 slot: Be ready for the next generation of faster, lighter PC card expansion products. When you use the ExpressCard/54 slot, data transfer rates jump from 10MBps to 500MBps.

Software bundle:
Microsoft® Windows® Home Edition with SP2, Works, Money, MSN® Encarta® Plus and Office 2003 Student/Teacher Edition (60-day trial), Windows Media Player and Movie Maker
Norton® Internet Security
Muvee AutoProducer DVD Edition with Burning
Sonic Digital Media Plus
HP PhotoSmart Premier and Quick Play
Adobe® Acrobat® Reader®
RealRhapsody

It's just now on the market, brand new! I can't take all the credit, two lovely, sweet, precious friends helped me find it: Suki and Raven. I am so happy! I couldn't have -- probably wouldn't have taken this particular leap w/out them. All the way back to the ranch today I couldn't help wondering what in Sam Hell I'm gonna do w/ 100GB hard drive?? I've not removed it from the box yet ... I'm still busy gazing lovingly at it. The box, I mean. Later I'll take it out and gaze lovingly at it w/ the lid closed. And then maybe tomorrow I'll gaze lovingly at the notebook w/ the lid open ... And so on.

Meanwhile I'm still using Old Grumpy. But not for long! It's just all the setup and customizing to make it "mine" that I dread. Needless to say, I'm not spending another dime for the rest of this whole year. You'll be calling me El-Cheapo. This year has severely traumatized me, given me a serious case of the vapors and I'm thinking I might even have to take to my bed.

But not tomorrow because it's my big baby's birthday! Indeed, my Snickerdoodle was born on Tax Day! In addition to the usual festivities I'm going to groom him for show. He adores being groomed, it makes him feel good and he loves the attention and all the adoration I have for him. He's a magnificent boy ... If you only knew -- but I simply can't put it into words. Naturally, I'll forward all your birthday wishes to him so feel free to email them! *LOL*

Now I really am taking to my bed -- for the night. I'm more exhausted than I have been in a very long time. I guess it's to be expected: Last night I slept five hours, the night before that only three ours and the night before that I didn't sleep at all. But I still got into the garden to plant! Now I'm dead. The Notorious Laptop Saga is finally over so now I can sleep. Yes, I have been known to occasionally obsess about things ...

And now it's my Big Man's birthday.

Later!

Oh, This is Cute

Not only is it cute but how encouraging! Check it out:

Samantha Highway Fame City 5 Mt. Happiness 20 Lake Love 46 Study Hall 102 Confusion Lane 274 Please Drive Carefully

Username:

Where are you on the highway of life?

From Go-Quiz.com

Yeehaw! I'm on my way now!

So I have a terrible admission to make. No ... Maybe I won't make it, at least not yet. It's sort of embarrassing. Let me put it this way: It involves Louis Vuitton. Need I say more? Didn't think so.

In today's Moron Files the winner of the day is Eminem! According to People magazine: "Less than three months after remarrying his ex-wife Kim Mathers, Eminem has filed divorce." After seeing their photo I think they're well-suited.


Good grief. Read it here:

We Deserve Each Other!

Katie Holmes is due "any moment" as evidenced by this photo:


What I'm very curious about is how she's gonna go for that "totally silent birth" insisted upon by the Church of Scientology. I wasn't given any drugs in L&D (although I was given oxygen -- sheesh!) and I can't fathom such a thing as a silent delivery. The only way they would have gotten me to shut up is if they knocked me out, I tell you what!

And speak of the devil -- no pun intended -- Tom Cruise tells People he had an abusive childhood. "He was a bully and a coward – the person where, if something goes wrong, they kick you. … It was a great lesson in my life, how he'd lull you in, make you feel safe and then, bang!"

Devil Speaks!

Back at Go-Quiz, I just did my warning label. I don't think I like it now.

PARENTAL

ADVISORY

SAMANTHA CONTAINS EXPLICIT LYRICS

Username:

From Go-Quiz.com

More later!

You Know It's Springtime ...

when THIS comes in your email at 11.00 on a Sunday night:

CNN Breaking News
-- At least eight people were killed when a tornado slammed into
northwestern Tennessee's Dyer County, emergency official says.

And it only got worse after that w/27 deaths in Tennessee alone, but fortunately it didn't hit us this time. We had some hail and high winds, but even in town there wasn't damage. Two years ago next 4 May a tornado went through that did take houses and buildings in town as well as tearing up Jackson quite a bit -- and parts in between. What really worries me is, living out here there are no sirens. One could land across the road and we'd never know until it was too late. If the power stays on the local channel in Jackson does nothing but weather the entire time tornadoes/extreme weather are a threat so that's something. But most of the time the power goes out fast!

I have more cats -- I love these cats! You simply must see them!

"I have heard of this condition before but to see it up close ... disturbing."

Gracie practices a little air guitar for her band, Death Leopard.

And, this one is for you, Sharmy!!

Oliver hates you for rendering him hairless with your evil Three Mile Island Lobster.

You know you love me, and you love the cats so don't go there.

Now. I got this in my email today and at first I thought it was very interesting, and why not? But after pondering on it for a minute I decided no way:

This is a picture of a public toilet in Houston:

Now that you've seen the outside view, take a look at the inside view...


It's made entirely of one-way glass! No one can see you from the outside, but when you are inside it's like sitting in a clear glass box!

Now would you... COULD YOU... use it?! That is the question. I just don't know ...

How about an uber-freebie? You know me, any book is a good book up to and including a phone book when I'm traveling, I've forgotten to bring a book and the hotel gift shop is closed. (That really sucks, by the way.) This may be a little young but who among us hasn't read a Harry Potter book? That's what I thought! And this one is free so let's go for it!

Free Book!

In the news, here's something I never thought I'd see -- Suge Knight files for bankruptcy but there's a method to his madness:

Suge Is Broke!

Good grief, Garth Brooks' ex-wife was kidnapped:

Sandy @ Gunpoint!

And, if you weren't concerned about flying yet get a load of this -- although weapons weren't smuggled ... yet. But what's next for the right price?

Air Marshals Plead Guilty!

Since it's almost midnight I better shut my laptop down for the night. Tomorrow I have the beginnings of the lovely task of going through boxes and getting the remainder of my personal belongings ready for a tag sale. It's been makin' me cry. A lot!

More later --